Five great reasons why Zara Holland has to stay as Miss Great Britain

Forget Brexit – here is the real crisis facing these famous isles.

Zara Holland Loaded
Zara Holland is trouble And Brits aren't going to like it

The United Kingdom is in the grip of a national crisis that’s threatening to upset the careful equilibrium that ensures Britain stays British.

Loaded refers, of course, to the news that Zara Holland’s position at Miss Great Britain is under threat in a development that is tantamount to treason.

Like the Queen herself, Holland has carried herself with all the grace and gravitas expected of a lady earning a living by posing in her underwear.

But our very freedoms, or rather the freedom of Miss Holland to have sex on national television, is now under threat after pageant bosses reacted badly to the news she indulged in a bit of hanky panky during her current stint on Love Island.

“We’re disappointed Zara stooped this low,” an inside source told The Sun. “She knows she’s a role model and knows we’re trying to change the image of Miss Great Britain.”

Personally, we prefer to look at her latest tryst as a bit of diplomatic work, on behalf of Great Britain, during her stay on the mysterious Love Island.

Maybe if the Queen followed her lead once in a while, Europe would be urging us to ditch any plans for an EU exit.

Whatever the case, here are five great reasons why Zara Holland has to stay as Miss Great Britain.

And by reasons, what we really mean to say is pictures.

1

Good interpersonal skills

Zara Holland Loaded

2

Displays diplomatic finesse

Zara Holland Loaded

3

Proud to wear the national colours

Zara Holland Loaded 

4

A right regal sort

Zara Holland Loaded

5

Does not rest of her laurels

Zara Holland Loaded
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