Why Men Need To Be Wary Of ‘Polar Penis’ This Winter

Stay warm this December guys...

Polar Penis
Polar Penis Stay warm this Winter guys... Image Coors Light/YouTube

December’s here, and it’s absolutely bloody freezing. At this time of year, the near-arctic temperatures can play havoc with your health, and affect you in ways you didn’t think possible. 

Chest infections, pneumonia and frostbite are possible health risks, but it turns out they could be the least of your worries this year.

Turning on the heating or putting on an extra layer might not be enough to defend you against one particularly nasty affliction – the ‘Polar Penis’.

A polar explorer is suffering with the horrendous condition, and it sounds like he’s in an absolute world of pain.

Alex Brazier, who’s the son of Tory MP Julian Brazi, is trekking 1,100 miles as part of a 17-man man expedition, which hopes to raise £100,000 for the Army Benevolent Fund. 

The trek has been a particularly painful one for Alex. Writing in a blog post, he said: “We found for some reason I was getting particularly chilly in the nether regions.

“There’s a phenomenon called Polar Penis, which sounds hilarious but as it turns out incredibly unpleasant, and really quite painful and cold, so suffering a bit from this morning.

Thankfully, Alex managed to stop to problem by shoving a hat down his trousers.

“Fortunately, I now have a large thick woollen hat stuffed down in that region. It turned out to make all the difference.

“The hat will probably stay there for the next 80 days.”

Most of us might not be experiencing artic climates just yet, but as temperatures drop this year, it’s important to be prepared and avoid the risk of Polar Penis, your sexual health might depend on it.

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Loaded staff writer Harry Fletcher has covered news, sport and entertainment for several major websites across the UK. Follow him on Twitter at @Harry__Fletcher.