Watch: Naked Man With Sex Toy Up Bum Turns Up At Petrol Station Asking For Help

No one knows how he ended up there. They didn't want to ask.

Have you ever had one of those nights out where you end up stark-bollock-naked, running around a petrol station with a dildo up your arse?

One rather unfortunate bloke from Buenos Aires in Argentina has and, worse still for the poor sod, loaded has got their hands on the footage to prove it.

The how and why of it is unclear. All we know is that a naked man with a sex toy up his backside turned up at a filling station in the Saavedra neighbourhood of the Argentine capital asking for help.

In the footage, uncovered by Metro, the nude man makes a beeline for an ambulance parked at the petrol station, shouting and slapping his legs in obvious discomfort.

At one point, a paramedic attempts to try and speak to the man, but he’s in no mood for conversation – he’s got a dildo up his bum, for Pete’s sake!

“Call the doctor!” he helpfully suggests. Wow. Can’t imagine how that particular phone call must have gone.

Thankfully, the story does have a happy ending of sorts. Well, happy enough. The bloke was eventually taken away and got the dildo removed from his anus.

There’s a lesson to be learned here. In fact, there are a few lessons.

Firstly, always be carefully when inserting foreign objects in any orfice. Secondly, a petrol station probably isn’t the best place to go for help late at night. It’s good for a hot sausage roll and a bottle of Yop but definitely not an ideal setting for dildo-related injuries.

Finally, people on social media could do with a little empathy. You wouldn’t want to be filmed at your very worst moment – with a dildo protruding from your arse – so why film them? That said, loaded is writing about it, so we appreciate the hypocrisy of that.

But how often do you see a naked man at a petrol station with a sex toy up him bum? The answer to that question should be rarely if at all.

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Loaded staff writer Jack Beresford has produced content for Lad Bible, Axonn Media and a variety of online sports and news media outlets.