Takeaways across the United Kingdom are preparing themselves for a glut of kebab orders this Valentine’s Day.
February 14th may be that one special day of the year when people up and down the country cosy up with someone special but it’s another story for singletons.
In fact, the date traditionally marks a major upsurge in the number of kebab orders.
Data collected by Uber Eats in 2017 revealed that. Single doner kebab sandwich was the most ordered food item on Valentine’s Day.
That’s an incredible statistic; especially when you consider a lot of couples probably opt to stay in and order food online themselves.
And it would appear that takeaways are preparing themselves for a similar influx in 2018 and have stocks up on kebab meat, pittas, onions and those weird little chillies.
A study put together by Uber Eats suggests singletons are set for another bingefest, with nine out of ten revealing they are dreading Valentines, while 18 per cent are planning on eating something absolutely filthy on the big day.
It doesn’t get much filthier than a big meaty kebab, ideally with lashings of sauce, and possibly some chips, depending on your appetite.
Kebabs represent the naughtiest of takeaway foods. Not only are they pretty hefty in the calorie department, but they are also seriously unhealthy.
Just a few months back, the European Union tried to push through measures to make kebabs illegal. Kebabs! Illegal! In this country? Thank God we’re leaving the EU, right? Hmmm.
In any case, Uber Eats is making it even easier to buy a kebab with a special buy one get one freee offer which is set to run from Valentine’s Day through to Sunday.
Which means you really don’t have to be miserable and lonely on February 14th to enjoy a kebab. Do it because it’s important to spend quality time with the one you love. Even if the one you love happens to be a kebab. Or a chicken burger. Or maybe a Chinese.
Each to their own!
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Loaded staff writer Jack Beresford has produced content for Lad Bible, Axonn Media and a variety of online sports and news media outlets.