This Study Argues That Extreme BDSM Fantasies Are Actually Super Normal

Your Kink Isn't As Weird As You Think

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What’s considered a ‘normal’ sexual fantasy?  BDSM, ménage à trois and strangers in the night were always thought to be the standard.

Our inner sexual life is usually judged on a social level based on decency or ‘deviancy’ but what about a legit scientific quantification? According to the DSM-5, which is the universal document used by psychologists for mental disorder diagnoses – paraphilia or extreme sexual desire is considered dangerous and not usual. Some of it definitely is, pedophilia? Yeah, we can all agree that’s beyond fucked up. 

However, the document also names bondage and domination as abnormal. So to the DSM, Fifty Shades of Grey really is ‘fifty shades of fucked up’ – gotta love corny script writing.

A study conducted by institutions associated with the University of Montreal in 2014- aimed to argue this particular claim. The researchers conducted a poll, asking 1,500 adults residing in Quebec with an average age of 30-years-old to jot down what gets them hot and bothered. They all answered an online questionnaire where they went into detail about their deepest darkest desires.

 

 

UNDATED -- Undated handout photo of Bettie Page in Mark Mori’s BETTIE PAGE REVEALS ALL film. HANDOUT: Music Box Films. Image Bettie Page

 

It turns out; the DSM is dead wrong. BDSM topped the list of most requested fantasies with both sexes. The surprising part was that almost half the women questioned wanted to be tied up and spanked.

As The Huffington Post reported, “There were significant gender differences in the participants’ responses. Men reported more fantasies overall and described them more vividly than did women.”

Women, however, weren’t as interested in their fantasies coming true while men were more game.

 

The study’s findings aren’t conclusive, and they were done over the interweb, but still, it is a great indicator of how stuffy and dated some perceptions still are when it comes to sexual exploration. Keep wet dreaming, we say.

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Loaded staff writer Danielle De La Bastide has lived all over the planet and written for BuzzFeed, Thought Catalog as well as print publications throughout the Caribbean.