Michael Jackson was a pretty strange guy at the best of times, so it’s not a massive surprise to hear that his beloved pet chimpanzee, Bubbles, may be a few fuses short of a full circuit.
The only unfortunate thing is that it took the terrifying experience of the ridiculously talented Rashida Jones for us to learn just how batsh*t crazy a primate Bubbles really is.
Speaking to Vice, Jones recalled a terrifying encounter with the prized chimp, during Jackson’s heyday working under her father, super producer Quincy Jones.
It was an attack that left Jones with a scar on her hand and the kind of chimpanzee scare story that could put you off The Jungle Book for life.
“It was like white for ten minutes. It was pouring blood”
“He was wearing a little full – like a little – overall jumpsuit and a striped shirt. To pretend he was a human,” Jones explained.
“I was trying to punish him because he threw something at me. And I like hit him on the head and say ‘no. Because I had seen Michael [Jackson] trying to punish him before.
“And he looked me dead in the eye and went [motions biting her hand]. It was like white for ten minutes. It was pouring blood.”
Despite the savage nature of the attack, Jones reckons Bubbles gave zero f*cks about the carnage he had caused. “He was like, ‘I’m the man’,” she summarised.
Jones is probably having the last laugh now though.
Hired to pen the script for Toy Story 4, having recently worked with Charlie Brooker on one of the episodes from the critically-lauded run of Black Mirror on Netflix, the future is looking very bright for the Parks and Recreation star.
Bubbles, meanwhile, currently resides in the Centre for Great Apes in Wauchula, Florida, having grown too big and aggressive to live free as a companion animal.
He probably shouldn’t expect a visit from Jones any time soon.
Loaded staff writer Jack Beresford has produced content for Lad Bible, Axonn Media and a variety of online sports and news media outlets.