Dick Pics truly are a modern phenomenon.
Before the advent of the digital age, the idea of sending a prospective partner a picture of your privates was unheard of – to do so by post would be time consuming and largely pointless exercise.
Fast forward to 2016 though and it would appear that there are a fair few blokes out there only too happy to take on the role of flasher for the cyber generation.
Honestly, it’s enough to make you despair for all of mankand but some women, at least, are able to find the funny side of this super-weird phenomenon.
Take Soraya Doolbaz, the founder of Dicture – the website and home of some of the most tasteful dick pics ever posted online.
An Iranian Canadian living in New York, Doolbaz’s own experience of receiving unsolicited images of this kind convinced her to create a space online for her artful penis pics with highlights including “Donald “The Dick” Trump” and “Benito Mussoweenie – no connection intended.
“These guys are looking for instant gratification. Let’s get right to the point type thing”
“I first put the concept together for pure comedy value alone. For the love of a good laugh. I thought the idea was hilarious and my friends agreed,” she explained to loaded.
Doolbaz has a pretty clear idea of the mentality behind the average dick pic too.
“These guys are looking for instant gratification. Let’s get right to the point type thing. ‘Tell me you like it.’ They are flirting and looking for approval.
“Guys used to send cards and flowers to woo a lady. What happened to courtship?”
Keen to redress the balance that has seen what she terms as “tits and ass” maintain prominent role in the media while penis appearances remain rare, the result is some of the most inventive dick pics you are ever likely to see with Doolbaz inviting blokes to volunteer for a series of photo shoots that see their privates get glammed up.
It’s a concept that has found a captive audience with like-minded men and women and has even spawned gallery exhibitions and an app designed to help guys take the best possible pictures of their penis.
“Stop the comparison dick pic with a can of soda or remote control. It’s so tacky and does nothing for women”
“Dick pics can be a welcome thing but it really depends on the relationship and recipient,” Doolbaz explains.
“If you’ve already been intimate with someone, its a nice way to be playful and flirty. However, if you haven’t, its so creepy and inappropriate. “
Having now overseen her fair share of dick pic photo shoots, Doolbaz also has a clear idea of what does and doesn’t’ work.
“Timing is important. Make sure its after the person has seen your dick in person. Lighting and camera angle play a big role in the actual esthetics of a great dick pic.“
“Stop the comparison dick pic with a can of soda or remote control. It’s so tacky and does nothing for women. Also, make sure your space is clean. Nothing worst than a half eaten food container or dirty laundry in the background.”
And while founding Dicture.com is not Doolbaz’s way of opening the floodgates to any number of flaccid and non-flaccid members, she does admit to responding to the majority of ‘cold callers’ that email her – provided their initial contact is courteous.
“Guys contact me because they want to know if theirs is good enough to be a model,” she explains.
“My response is always the same. The perfect dick is attached to a confident man with a good sense of humor. Size and characteristics don’t matter.”
Having helmed some 30+ dick pic photo shoots, it’s clear that Doolbaz takes pride in her work, even going as far as picking out a favourite picture from her hilarious collection.
“I LOVE Fidel Cockstroke. It took me a while to get that costume and it was very expensive,” she laughs.
“It was a one of a kind Castro collectors doll. I basically took the clothes off and threw away the doll.”
Hilarious and creative, if a little extreme for some conservative tastes, Doolbaz is on a one woman mission to not only entertain but raise awareness that while it’s cool to pose for Dicture, you’ll only end up looking like a dick if you keep going with the unsolicited snaps.
You can check out more snaps from Soraya below or better even better still head over to dicture.com.
Loaded staff writer Jack Beresford has produced content for Lad Bible, Axonn Media and a variety of online sports and news media outlets.