How To Pull Off The Perfect Sick Day Without Your Boss Suspecting A Thing

Getting away with a bout of fake illness is riddled with pitfalls.

Calling in sick.

There are few things trickier in life than attempting to trick your boss into thinking you are unwell and unable to come into work, especially when nothing could be further from the truth.

Maybe you’ve got a fun day-time activity planned with your mates, maybe you just can’t bring yourself to face the world and would rather delay the inevitable – whatever the case, sometimes in life you just need to pull a sickie.

Things can go wrong and often do, of course. People have been known to email in their sickness, something most companies frown on, or they leave it to the very last minute to tell their employer about their absence.

In one unique instance, a former colleague who shall remain nameless called in sick and then absent-mindedly ordered a large pizza to the office without thinking. They then tried to pretend they had done it on purpose. It was awkward all round.

An ordinary man flu sufferer.

No, if you want to pull off the perfect sick day, new research suggests you follow a very simple set of rules.

Based on a survey of 1,000 ordinary office workers, one study was able to calculate the perfect time to get that extra day off in [via The Sun].

According to the research, the best time to fake an illness is on a Monday in February, You ideally need to call your boss between 8:0-1am and 8:30am and only take one day off work.

Man flu is a very real thing.

 

Pull all of that off and you should be free and clear to enjoy the day. For reference, Monday falls on the 5th, 12, 19th and 26th in February 2018. Just saying.

Stay strong too – the research, conducted on behalf of Fisherman’s Friend, also found that two in 10 people who call in sick end up admitting to faking their illness when they return to work. Don’t do it. Stay strong.

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Loaded staff writer Jack Beresford has produced content for Lad Bible, Axonn Media and a variety of online sports and news media outlets.