Geoffrey Chaucer Was Given A Gallon Of Wine A Day For His Kick Ass Poetry

Wine not?

A gallon of wine a day Hungover for life

Geoffrey Chaucer has achieved many things in life and death. He was the first poet to be buried in Westminster Abbey’s poet’s corner, he is considered the father of English literature and one of the greatest poet’s of the middle ages. He also continues to be popular today with close to 12,000 Facebook fans.

Other interesting facts about Chaucer: he once had a part time job collecting scrap metal and there is crater on the moon named after him. How about that?

Notably, he was a favourite of England’s King Edward III, who reigned during the 14th century. Chaucer’s father was a wine merchant so perhaps this gave the king some inspiration when he decided to grant Chaucer a gallon of wine a day for the rest of his life. He gifted the poet this prize in 1347 on St George’s day when artists are awarded for their contributions.

After the king’s death, Richard II continued the tradition but converted the liquid stipend to cash.

Here at loaded wondered, what would a gallon of wine a day do to the human body? We scoured the internet landscape to see if anyone has considered trying this out. Yahoo! answers is the gift that keeps on giving. 

A user asked, “If I drink a gallon of red wine in 3 hours is it bad for me?”

The best answer: “You will drown you liver. I would definitely advise against it. I can drink a regular bottle of wine in a day, but that’s over many many hours. Have you considered that there is a possibility of alcohol poisoning? And why would you even consider something like that?”

Well, we doubt Chaucer attempted this since he lived almost thirty years more after receiving this generous gift. 

Please, no one attempt this. 

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Loaded staff writer Danielle De La Bastide has lived all over the planet and written for BuzzFeed, Thought Catalog as well as print publications throughout the Caribbean.