A woman has ripped into her ex on eBay while selling his tricked out ‘boy racer’ car.
Lauren Mason has hilariously described the limited edition 2007 Skoda Fabia VRS 1.9 TDI formerly owned by her ex husband as “a loud, annoying brap brap boy racer car.”
The car is apparently in great condition since ‘it was the only thing my ex husband ever cared about,’ writes Mason. She goes on to detail the car’s modifications, ‘It has coil overs, so you wont want to drive on a road with speed-bumps or potholes unless you want your girlfriend to potentially swallow her boobs and have a teeth chattering driving experience.”
Nothing is off limits in the sales pitch, which also concludes that the former owner wasn’t the best at parking, since the alloys are slightly worse for wear. His lower region also gets thrown in the fire, she blames the numerous modifications done by her ex, “as an extension of where he lacked in other area’s.” Oh, burn.
Probably the funniest aspect of the paragraph is where she wittingly paints the reason for some slight seat damage, “One minor cosmetic issue is that it has a small hole in the drivers seat. Probably from where his backside rubbed the seat constantly with his jigging up and down for “go faster speed.”
Her well-worded and biting description has since gone viral, but Mason claims that their is no ill will. While she isn’t a woman scorned, she does want the todger off her driveway.
The car itself is going for £4000 with 125,000 miles on the clock, but it comes with a full service record and probably one of the funniest advertisements on the internet at the moment.
Loaded staff writer Danielle De La Bastide has lived all over the planet and written for BuzzFeed, Thought Catalog as well as print publications throughout the Caribbean.