We’ve all had one of those cars. It constantly breaks down, randomly fails its M.O.T. and will conk out at the worst possible time.
People will tell you that owning a clapped-out banger is just part and parcel of this crazy experience we call life. Something to look back on when you are old and laugh.
But when you’re the owner of one of these petrol-guzzling rust buckets, there’s really only one thing you want to do: smash the hell out of it. Just take a bat and smash it to pieces.
Unfortunately, that’s not really all that possible when you need to get to work or the shops in the goddam thing. But help could finally be at hand.
It’s called Car Smash and it might be the most enjoyable experience of your entire life. Leave the stresses of work behind with a trip to the party city of Amsterdam in Holland.
Located in a scrap yard on the outskirts of the city, the concept of Car Smash could not be simpler: you are assigned a car, due to be scrapped, along with overalls, protective gear and a selection of tools perfectly suited to taking said car apart.
Sledgehammers, baseball bats, crowbars, golf clubs and hammers are just a couple of the options on offer, as you go to town on your chosen vehicle, which you can also spray paint with any number of expletives or Emojis, if you’re down with the kids.
Every smash, rip and shattered bit of glass strikes a blow for anyone who has ever endured any kind of motoring misery. It’s brutal, surprisingly strenuous and very, very fun.
Merlijn Boshuizen is the brains behind the concept, which can be booked through The Stag Company, but is suited to more than just drunken groups of stags and hens.
He told loaded that the Car Smash has proven equally popular with friends looking to have a bit of fun and even companies on corporate away days, keen to bond and let off some steam.
With Boshuizen providing music to help get you in the mood for the smash-based mayhem to come (there’s a lot of Rage Against the Machine and Limp Bizkit) this is possibly the most unique holiday experience of your life.
We’ve all had one of those cars. This is your chance to get some revenge.
Knightmare Live: How A Cult TV Classic Became An Acclaimed Stage Show
Loaded staff writer Jack Beresford has produced content for Lad Bible, Axonn Media and a variety of online sports and news media outlets.