7 Valentine’s Day Gifts For Her (That Are Really For You)

This good advice is free, unlike those stupid roses

What does your heart desire, dudes? Image CraveOnline

Valentine’s Day is tomorrow and guys are notoriously not excellent at remembering this event created by card companies.

While many stories come out of the woodwork regarding super romantic gestures (that make us want to vom a little), the other side of the coin is more entertaining. Specifically the horrible fails that many a partner has to endure. Toilet paper embossed with ‘I love you from top to bottom’ or naming a cockroach after someone. Jesus. 

Whether it’s too over the top or not enough, there is large proportion of couples who can’t seem to get it right on February 14th.

We could always pull a Pakistan and ban the bloody day completely, since it’s too ‘decadent.’

Nevertheless it’s almost here and we have a few tips when it comes to gifts for your missus that you chaps can also benefit from. A win, win sort of day sounds fine and dandy to us.

Here are seven gifts for her (that are really for you). 

 


 

 

1

LG Flat Screen TV

Nothing says love like Netflix and Chill. 

2

Boyfriend Hoodie

So she stops fucking stealing yours. 

ASOS

 

3

A Trip To M&M’s World

Everyone wins. 

Jeff More

 

4

Skydiving

Sometimes the only way to discover if its true love is to jump out of a plane together. Plus, its a fucking rush. Lest we forget the porn star Voodoo who made history by having sex while skydiving last year. Now that’s a memory. 

 

YouTube

 

5

Tickets

Just say, I got tickets. She’ll never know they’re for extreme midget wrestling until there’s no turning back.

 

YouTube

 

6

Sex Toys

In the spirit of Fifty Shades of Grey, try the Fifty Shades Darker Kinky Fuckery Wild Couples Kit which comes with a travel-sized flogger in case you’re on a couple’s getaway. 

Lovehoney

 

7

Giant Fucking Dairy Milk

Enough said. 

(Photo by Oli Scarff/Getty Images)

Have a good one!

 

Giphy/ABC
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Loaded staff writer Danielle De La Bastide has lived all over the planet and written for BuzzFeed, Thought Catalog as well as print publications throughout the Caribbean.